So what do you do?

I've been wrestling with the question - What do I do now that I've been hurt? It's been almost a year and I have really gotten beyond most of the visible emotions of the situation. I don't cry or act angry every time someone brings it up. So now what?

Up until last week, I was trying to put it behind me. Treat it like a divorce. They made their choice. I did what was best for my family (leave). Now I need to settle into another church. I've been blessed to attend a church for the last three months that seems to understand how to love people. It will take time to build relationships, but there are plenty of opportunities for service and it appears to be a healthy spiritual environment. This is particulary important for my children's sake.

Then, I had a conversation with a friend who believes neither us nor the church we left will truly heal until we reconcile. The Bible does speak a lot about reconciliation. But it has to be a two-way street. I believe that if Paul and Peter never reconciled their differences, Paul would have gone on without him. But that conversation has now (potentially) put some responsibility back on me, and I don't know what to do with it.

My prayer that day was a little different. I ask God what he would have me to do. I'm scared to death what He's going to say. But, so far, I do not feel the Holy Spirit leading me to contact anyone about reconciliation.

Guess it needs more prayer. In the meantime, I have to move on - for my own sanity.